The Longest Story Ever by Andrew Wooding - Day #3

(You can join this epic story at any time, but have fun browsing the archives if you want to dip into past instalments or even start from the beginning. Feel free to leave your comments as well. Cartoons by Mychailo Kazybrid.)


Yesterday we read that Charlie the Dog's maid had discovered her boss at the bottom of a smelly laundry basket. He was hiding from Ethel who wanted to serve him one of her infamous breakfasts. Charlie would do anything he possibly could to avoid eating one of those infamous breakfasts. (They were infamous because they were stomach-turningly awful.)

One time Charlie had climbed up onto the top of their roof, even though it was cold and snowy up there. He thought he was safe, but he'd forgotten that Ethel was an expert at hang-gliding. Wearing her pilot's goggles and a vintage World War 2 crash helmet, she glided past him on the roof while expertly handing him a tray with one of her horrible breakfasts.

'Don't forget to eat it all up, sir,' she shouted back at him while narrowly avoiding a tree.

I won't tell you what Charlie shouted back at her.

Another time, Charlie locked himself in the cellar, even though it was cold, dark and dusty down there, with lots of scary spiders and other assorted creepy-crawlies.

He smiled when he locked the cellar door, wiped his brow and breathed a happy sigh of relief.

'Phew, made it,' he muttered to himself. 'There's no way Ethel will get to me down here.'

'What was that, sir?' said Ethel.

'I said, there's no way that … eh? Who said that?'

'Me, sir,' said Ethel. 'I've just been sprinkling some nice nutritious cobwebs all over your porridge. Much more healthy than horrible jam or sugar. Here it is, sir. Hope you like it.'

I don't need to tell you that Charlie didn't like it. Just as Charlie didn't like being found at the bottom of the laundry basket.

'I'm glad I found you, sir,' said Ethel. 'Now I can give you your breakfast.'

'Gulp,' went Charlie. It would take him a day to recover … which is how long you'll have to wait to read the next exciting instalment.


Today’s total: 330 words (Total so far: 959 words)