The Longest Story Ever by Andrew Wooding - Day #4

(You can join this epic story at any time, but have fun browsing the archives if you want to dip into past instalments or even start from the beginning. Feel free to leave your comments as well. Cartoons by Mychailo Kazybrid.)


Ethel, Charlie the Dog's maid, was world-renowned for making the worst breakfasts ever.

Charlie the Dog, world-famous poodle detective, was renowned for hating Ethel's breakfasts with a passion.

He'd had to eat one this morning and it took him ages to recover. Luckily, it was his day off, so at least he didn't have to catch lots of cackling evil criminals while trying to recuperate. Instead, he was relaxing in his back garden.

'This is the life.'

Now that some of the effects of the breakfast had worn off, Charlie was really happy.

It was a sunny day, but that wasn't the reason he was happy.

He was lazing in his favourite stripey deckchair, but that wasn't the reason he was happy.

He was listening to the soundtrack of his favourite musical, Dog-Whistle Down the Wind, but that wasn't the reason he was happy.

No, the reason he was happy was that Ethel was nowhere to be seen. She wasn't in the garden, picking weeds and nettles for one of her sloppy stews. She wasn't at work in the kitchen, concocting a poisonous mixture otherwise known as dinner. And she couldn't be seen through the living room window, pushing the vacuum cleaner around on 'blow' rather than 'suck' because she couldn't tell the difference and spraying thick clouds of dust everywhere.

For all Charlie knew, she might be on the other side of the world, and as far as he was concerned that was the best place for her.

'I hope she never comes back,' he wished out loud. 'From now on I can do my own cooking and never have to go to hospital to have my stomach pumped again.'

Poor Charlie. He was in for a horrible surprise.

What was it? Well, if I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise now, would it? But you might just find out if you read tomorrow's exciting instalment.


Today’s total: 318 words (Total so far: 1,277 words)