The Longest Story Ever by Andrew Wooding - Day #12

(You can join this epic story at any time, but have fun browsing the archives if you want to dip into past instalments or even start from the beginning. Feel free to leave your comments as well. Cartoons by Mychailo Kazybrid.)


When you hear the word ‘exciting’, you probably don’t think of tree centres. ‘Boring’ might be the word that comes to mind.

But in Charlie the Dog’s local tree centre, ‘exciting’ was entirely appropriate. That’s because a young boy called Nigel was riding an out-of-control tree just like a bucking bronco in the Wild West. Nigel was dressed like a cowboy, complete with sharp spurs attached to his boots, and the spurs were digging into the tree’s trunk.

‘Ow! Ow! Ow!’ screamed the tree and it ran round in agony, with Nigel holding on for dear life.

He didn’t hold on for long. The tree swerved and swayed, and hopped, skipped and jumped so much that Nigel lost his grip and fell with a ‘Thud!’ on the lawn.

‘Waaaaaahh!’ he screamed.

Charlie the Dog and his maid Ethel happened to be at the tree centre while this was all happening. Ethel had been telling Charlie that there was a tree on the loose, running around from one part of the tree centre to another. But he didn’t believe her.

Now Charlie had seen it with his own eyes. He had also heard it with his own ears. But he’d smelt it with someone else’s nose … which is a very clever trick that not many people can do.

‘My goodness, Ethel, you were right,’ said Charlie, more astonished at his maid than the tree. ‘For the first time ever you got something completely right. Incredible!’

Ethel didn’t know whether to take this as an insult or a compliment.

‘Well, I, er…’ she said, but Charlie interrupted her.

‘No time to talk now,’ he said. ‘I’m going to investigate this tree. I want to see if its bark is worse than its bite.’

‘You mean, you want to twig what’s going on?’ said Ethel.

‘Exactly,’ said Charlie, ‘and if it’s as serious as I think, I might have to call in the special branch.’

With jokes like that, I bet you’re glad today’s instalment is now over. Tomorrow’s instalment will be better … I promise.


Today’s total: 344 words (Total so far: 3,941 words)